Overlapping while holding your breath waiting to breathe

When  a  person in  your  life has  a  drug  addiction not  only does  it  affect  every area of their  life it  affects  every area  of their  loved ones  lives  as well. Loving  a  drug  addict  and  dealing with  their  issues and  them  in  general  is not  a part time  thing or  a sometime  thing  it consumes every moment  of  you . Every  second  your  wondering  where they  are,  who  are they  with, and   what  are they doing all  these  things  are  running  through  your mind  like  an  olympic athlete continually  keeping  you  exhausted  and  unable  to breathe life into  your  own  body.   The  constant  dealings  of  having  a  drug  addict in your  life  over  laps  into  every other  area  of  your  life  as  well.  Work, school ,relationship with  friends,  your  other  children and  most  of  all  your significant  other. Unfortunately  all the  stress  and  anguish  becomes  anger  and  bottled up  frustration  and  confusion  that  is not  taken out  on the person it  should be  The  Addict no  its  in  all the  the  areas  and  people  in  our lives  that  it  overlaps  into  that  we  vent out  at. The  addict  doesn’t  see  the  destruction  of  the  lives  he/she  are  destroying  outside  themselves  they  are  like  a skipping  child with no  cares  at  all  living  in their  own  little  world  feeding  their  downward  spiral. However when  their  addiction is not being  fed  it is  all  your fault  and  you  are the  one being  attack   from them  causing  even more  issues  in  all  overlapping  areas  of  your  life.

While  the  world was  falling  apart  for me as  I  watched  my  son become  engulfed  within  his  addiction . I  often  did  nothing  but  die  a  little  each  day myself  his  addiction  was  killing me just  as  slowly  as it  was  killing  him  but  just in  a  different  way .  I turned  inward  pushing  the  overlapping  areas  of  my  life  away  not  wanting  to  talk  or be  around  others . However  my  overlapping  areas  wouldn’t  let me  do that  even  if  it  was  a short  text  a message ,a message  on my  voicemail  or  persistant person refusing  to  be  casted  away  everyday  someone reached  out not  even knowing  why I was so sad and  the  situation  that was  going  on. My overlapping  areas where  my  support  and  my only  strength  some  days.

Whereas  I  was not  grateful   at that  time  I  so  am  now  looking  back  on it. If  you  are  in  a  situation  were  you   have  a  drug  addict  in  your  life  especially  if  it your  child  allow  the  overlapping  areas of your life  be  a  support system to  you .They  don’t  need  to  know the  details  of  things taking place just  let  them  be your  strength  when  you  can not be  your  own.

 

 

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5 thoughts on “Overlapping while holding your breath waiting to breathe

  1. There are people to support you through it all. I found myself to be the biggest obstacle to that support. It is hard to “allow” people to support you when you think “they have no idea”. All we have to do is open up and let them in.

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  2. I found this blog and I wonder if you will get this. My sweet son has been using to some degree since he was about 15 he’s now 38. Precious wife and 3 little girls. 14, 11 and 6 months. All seemed somewhat normal til about 4 years ago. He has steadily gotten more difficult and belligerent. My sweet daughter in law has decided to leave. Girls are devastated because at one time he was such a great daddy. Was in church and I want to believe he wasn’t using then. But when things get tough. He uses it as a crutch. We need someone to ask questions to. I just don’t know what to say to him. I love him with all my heart and I keep telling him that. But he of course thinks I’ve turned on him. I will always support these sweet little girls.
    Lots more to say but I would have to write a book.

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  3. In all honesty there is nothing to say to untill he truly wants help and be completly free of his addiction . I personal found support group it didn’t make things better but it helped me cope, I pray a lot . At one point I was asked a question by another parent who had been through the same thing What do you do if your childs addiction never gets better? That was an eye opening question b/c it made me think about how I focused all my attention on my son and his addiction and closed the rest of the world out including my self . We as parents tend to be just as engulfed with the addiction as the addict just on a different level. If you ever need to talk or vent you are more than welcome to email me

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